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Tips And Tricks When You’re Dating Someone Who Loves Jiu-Jitsu


Because if you are or plotting to…you need to read this.

My father has been doing Aikido and Judo since before I was born. I was never very into this while growing up, but that didn’t deter him from trying (profusely) to pass along his love of martial arts to me. Eventually, I think I wore him down when I knotted his black belt into a perfect bow. I do feel a bit bad that I coudn’t really get into what my father loves, but honestly very relieved because I fervently believe that there is no coordinated bone in my body (although I can walk in very high heels even when I’m tipsy and darling that’s a skill!).

So after the bow incident, my father gave up on his dreams of having a martial artist daughter and I thought that I have escaped this claw forever! Then I met a boy, a seemingly normal boy – but then to my surprise I discovered that he too is in fact into martial arts, specifically BJJ (LOL).

After finding out that BJJ actually means Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, I thought, “Ok, that’s interesting”. Dating someone who’s into BJJ can’t be that different, after all I’ve been exposed to this sort of thing since forever via my dad. Boy was I wrong! However, it is very interesting and  yes, at times a bit odd (ie, arm locks in public), but all in all very lovely!

So for your benefit and relationship survival, I’ve written a few tips and tricks when dating a BJJ enthusiast.


I have referred to arm locks in the previous page. Please know that these are not in any way abusive. I quickly learned that sometimes, that’s just how they express their playfulness and endearment. These are not evil arm locks. These are arm locks of love.


Don’t panic.The trick to getting out of the arm lock without knowing how to get out of the arm lock is usually to pretend that you’re enjoying the situation. I usually say, “I can hug you like this forever”. 


The post work out meal is very important, especially after grappling all over the floor. They exert way too much energy and must be replenished by everything edible in sight.


Always stash hearty food in your fridge. Specifically meat – meat is life. Also, try not to get jealous when you see them cramming everything in their body and gain literally no weight at all. That’s just how life is.


They spend a lot of time at the gym, perfecting their techniques. And especially right before a fight. (You probably already know this).


It is possible to feel neglected when  your partner is out spending hours on doing something he/she loves. But don’t feel bad, remember that this is their craft and you can be as dedicated to your own. The gym is their “me-time”. It’s best to find/have your own too!


BJJ is a contact sport. Black eyes, and other injuries come with the package.


Try not to show your shock too much when they come to your family dinner with a black eye. “It wasn’t a street fight Mom, he just kneed himself in the eye”. And strangely enough, that statement doesn’t seem weird to you at all…anymore.


Sometimes cuddling turns into something else, and no I wasn’t referring to sex, aww 🙁


I don’t know what RNC means, I had to google it. I usually just pretend I’m a lifeless body. They can’t grapple with a lifeless body.

At the end of the day, you will discover that they’re really great , and all the random things become endearing. And then eventually you’ll realized that it does make you feel proud to love someone so dedicated to their craft.

Also, have you heard of Kron Gracie?

You have now. You’re welcome.





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